To All My Friends (Who’ve Wondered Where I’ve Been)

I know I haven’t been around much lately. Too much anger. Didn’t really want to get it on you. I have a tendency to spew hate when I’m angry. I hate it when the bad guys win… I’ve been experiencing a what-the-fuck few weeks. The American election was hacked and I’m surrounded on all sides by people waiting for their chance to say “I told you so.”

“I told you so.” Among the bodies of the dead.

“I told you so.” Brought to you by the makers of Pepsi and Xanax.

“I told you so.” Translated from the original Russian. (actually, little known fact, it was in German before it was in Russian)

I’ve reached a point in my life where more people are younger than me than older. I’m surrounded on all sides by the children of the damned. Social media misfits more concerned with likes and dislikes. Trolls without bridges. History books unopened. But mouths that will not stay shut.

chinese-farmer

I haven’t been around much lately because I know me. The thoughts racing through my head should not be shared with anyone. My doctor doesn’t want to know. My lawyer doesn’t want to know. The fake twitter accounts of Russian trolls, who successfully influence the tired liberals into hopelessness and fits of screaming, don’t want to know.

For one misguided instant I considered self-immolation as a form of protest. Nothing else, it seems, can penetrate the walls of the corporate pay-to-play media and so-called social media’s cavernous, echo-amplifying, bottomless pits of ego and frustration. Setting myself on fire in front of some monument to our fallen democracy seemed like a good idea at the time… for like, literally, a second. For like one scary second.

So I’ve been away.

And I apologize. I figure there’s like 25 or 30 people who read my blog. And I love you guys. And I’m going to post some good stuff. Life goes on no matter how dire. I know my friend Alex misses my movie reviews. New shows, some of the best stuff I’ve seen on TV, came and went. Anybody watch Atlanta? That was amazing. Donald Glover is knocking it out of the park on the daily. Speaking of which, my list of the best albums from this year includes more genres than you can shake your rump at. Who knew I’d like Trap Music. OMG I like Trap Music.

Music, Movies, TV, the third chapter of my novel… but politics, fucking politics, pissed me off to such an extent that I couldn’t write but scream. I couldn’t think but scream. I could not talk because all the screaming made me lose my voice.

So I went away. Started meditating again. Got back to temple. Working out. Stopped doing the few remaining vices I’d allowed myself over the past decade. Pizza, Beer, Porn, Masturbation. It’s about time I stopped living like a 13 year boy without adult supervision. I’m gonna be 50 next year. And the US president is going to be Donald J. Tr… I can’t even say it.

The pounds flew off since I stopped eating garbage. It’s amazing how much more money I have in my budget since I stopped drinking. And the energy. The sexual energy. The mental energy. The spiritual energy… it’s through the roof. And now being channeled into less selfish endeavors.

thats-great-maybe

Doing yoga everyday. Getting to the temple at least three times a week. Working on my compassion and my mindfulness and my body. I will require these things to make it through the next few weeks. Let alone the next few years of protests and civil (and uncivil) disobedience. Gotta build my stamina for all the marching and demonstrating. Because, as you know, Donald J. Tr… I still can’t say it.

I’ll never be able to say it.

What is the true nature of reality? We see things as we want them or don’t want them to be. Sometimes a fantasy. And sometimes as our worst fears realized. We label situations and phenomena as good or bad. As helpful or unhelpful. As progress and advancement or… as the… the nightmarish, back-sliding, hateful, racist hell-scape that I can’t seem to wake up from. Somebody please wake me up.

WAKE ME UP!!!

I meditate to find love for the seemingly unlovable. I meditate to find focus amidst the din of unchecked voices (un-fact-checked and un-verified). I meditate to find the me that can help and not just criticize. That can pull his weight and not just pull his dick. That can be a calm in the storm and not just more destruction and distraction.

Because it’s looking more and more like we’re going to have to violently overthrow the US government. And I don’t say that lightly. People are going to die. People are going to die because they’ve lost their healthcare and can’t afford their treatments. Because they’ve lost their government jobs as the agencies that protect us, from emotionless and compassion-less corporations, are shuttered one after another. People are going to die because they’ve lost their minds after too many deployments in some foreign distraction called another war. People are going to die.

thats-awful-maybe

And we can’t just sit around waiting for a miracle. Like that one time that one guy resigned from being pope because he realized he was too evil and stuff to be pope so he let the cool guy be pope. We can’t wait for that. We can’t wait for lightning to strike his ostentatiously disgusting jet plane as it floats on a cloud of ego or one of his fucking hotels to collapse under the weight of his hubris. We can’t wait for that. And we can’t sit around watching our neighbors die from treatable diseases or complications from dangerous pregnancies or malnutrition. Fucking malnutrition in the 21st century.

So yeah. We need to violently overthrow the US government… but with love. Out of compassion for our fellow human beings these people have to go… on both sides. I will not be governed by hate. And also I will not be governed by hate. So that really no one has to die for idiotic and preventable reasons.

We’ve been hacked. Our election. Our government. Hacked.

And respectfully, the only course of action, after you’ve been hacked, after they infiltrated your system, installed their malware, their trojans, their porn, the only course of action is to unplug the damn computer, and reinstall the operating system.

I went away.

But I’m back.

I’m going to see Rogue One tomorrow. So I’ll let you guys know how I like it. I’m going to post all my reviews and stuff over the holiday season. There’s a lot. You know I didn’t even realize it was the holidays. This is usually my least favorite time of year (except for the Doctor Who special). Because I’m alone and everything about this time is geared toward family and friends and stuff. But ever since I’ve rediscovered my faith, going to temple and Dharma classes and meditation, I don’t feel so alone.

I feel great actually. This is the best I’ve felt in a long time. The healthiest I’ve been mentally, spiritually and physically. The best.

And to think, I owe it all to the rigged, hacked, fraudulent and fucked up election of Donald J. Tr… you know what, I still can’t say it.

You guys thank him for me.

See ya tomorrow after Rogue One (unless I’m too hyped to post anything but OMG OMG OMG OMG then I’ll post on Saturday after Dharma class)

Now watch this 2 minute video.

– Mel

The Journal of the Man in the Box 2

Mel Rook and the 7 Deadly Sins update

First up…

GLUTTONY

Carrot Fries

Carrot Fries with olive oil, light mayo & ketchup is my new food obsession.

They started offering organic produce at my local market.
Just potatoes, onions and bananas so far.

But the bananas don’t ripen like I like them. They go from green to green with brown spots to greasy black.

Brown Rice
I made the switch from white to brown rice a couple of months ago. I had rocked the white rice for too long. A few times I tried to switch but I couldn’t get the brown rice right. This time I consulted the hive mind (aka The Internet) and now I’m the brown rice master. I buy it in bulk and put it in jars and refrigerate it.

In April I only ate fruits, vegetables, beans, oats and brown rice
A lot of broccoli & the organic potatoes, tomatoes, peppers, onions, garlic, carrots (love them fries).

Scrambled Eggs

I throw in eggs with my veggies in the morning (or is it the other way around?).

I still like oatmeal in the afternoons with bananas or raisins & cinnamon.

And some mixture of stir fried veggies over rice for dinner or beans and rice.

Feeling good. I plan to try to keep this up. Wish me luck.

“I MISS BACON!!”

Who said that?

Next there’s…

GREED

Student Loans… am I right?

I will be paying off my student loans until the day I die.

The interest is ridiculous thanks to all of my years living on the street and never holding down a steady job or a permanent address.

But now that I’ve stopped moving they’ve found me. I will be paying for my college loans for the rest of my life. (But I will probably die still owing them, so I win)

And honestly I think I snorted, smoked and blew most of that money anyway. I never finished school. because it’s difficult to hold a full-time job, a full-time addiction and a full class load while sleeping part-time on the subway.

I wonder what made me think I could do that?

Oh yeah…

PRIDE

cropped-photo-75.jpg

Not too proud of myself these days. Not making much progress spiritually, mentally… actually. But here are my 10 favorite blog entries from this blog…

Building the Perfect Mel A list of people I wish I were more like.

5 Prophetic Films Films about the future that have already come to pass.

N* Brown A short story about a dude with a bad name.

Exhibit A A poem about me.

10 Things I will Never Get To Do My reverse bucket list: My fuck-it list.

Great Adaptations Good films from good books.

10 Unsolicited Questions Questions I do not like.

Gripes of Wrath random venting.

5 Films where the Earth Blows Up Self explanatory.

Lust Looks at the Legs on Regis Kelly Ripa & others. Legs Lust.

Speaking of…

LUST

My Pinterest Boards and My Pinterest Feed have become a parade of pretty pictures and beautiful bodies from Emma Watson to Hugh Jackman From Felicia Day to Benedict Cumberbatch.

Haven’t been posting anything lustful on here, I guess, because my Pinterest has kept me visually engaged.

I’ve always been a very visual person. (why my deteriorating eyesight bothers me so damn much)

“EAT MORE CARROTS!!”

You sure???

Not bacon?

“DON’T TEASE ME!!!”

Next up…

ENVY

facebook-Envy-Best-1

These days I envy the people living their lives in the open air.

I’m getting more and more tired of this cage, of my self-imposed exile from the world. Looking at my friends’ vacation pics or relationship pics or family pics and feeling the jealousy has become my new pastime.

I was hoping I would have broken free by now but the longer I stay hidden the harder it is. The longer I stay grounded the harder it is for me to imagine taking flight.

Don’t know.

and…

WRATH

Fox News

This realization that the U.S. Government wouldn’t be this dysfunctional if we had a white male president fills me with disgust.

Congress refuses to work with President Obama. The Ayn Rand-ians are using it as a way to shrink the Federal Government’s power in favor of corporate power.

And I don’t think we will be having a non-white president again. Not anytime soon. All they have to do is promise to act up again if Hillary Clinton gets elected and we probably won’t have a woman in the oval office either.

This childish behavior from the right and the endless parade of conspiracy theories is making me sick.

Stay classy USA.

Obamas

Finally…

SLOTH

TV is still good and no longer the September to May romance it was when I was younger.

The Good

Great TV shows this season

History of the Time War

Doctor Who has been great this year. Love the new companion and all the episodes have been immensely re-watchable.

Mad Men has been great as well. The stories are still interesting and the characters are still deep  and the acting is still top notch.

A couple of Canadian shows coming to the states:
Motive & Continuum are both amazing and very original.

Motive

Motive is a police procedural that tells the audience who the killer is in the first few seconds of each episode. In my opinion this frees up the actor to play the killer more authentically because they are no longer trying to fool the audience just the other characters. It is a fantastic show that is incredibly addictive. A mystery where you already know who did it… just not why.

Continuum is a science fiction action-thriller time travel series that is just amazing. Time travelling terrorists come back in time to change the future and our hero, the lovely Rachel Nichols, follows them back in time to stop them. Very cool time travel story. I recommend it highly to fans of  Police Dramas, Futuristic Science Fiction & Doctor Who.

Game of Thrones has been riveting and not at all “too rapey” for me. I love this show. It scares me a little because I worry about them maintaining this level of awesome.

Still loving Elementary to death.

Lucy Liu as Watson

Lucy Liu is a great Watson and I love her wardrobe. I really enjoyed the finale. I’m not going to spoil it but there’s some great casting. After 22 kick-ass episodes, it’s your move Sherlock.

Once Upon a Time has stayed consistently good and I like the way they’ve moved the stories along, changing the rules each season. Don’t know about this Wonderland spin-off though.

The last season of Justified was just as bad-ass as ever with cool shootouts and stories and…

Timothy Olyphant (Happy Birthday Timmy) is still doing a hell of a job as U.S. Marshal Raylan Givens.

Also American Horror Story, in my opinion got better in its second season. I really loved watching  Lily Rabe this year. I hope she comes back for another season.

And the first season of The Vikings was sensational. I didn’t expect much but it was excellent and quickly became one of my favorite shows from this year.

Portlandia

But this past season of Portlandia was the best… the best.

The Bad

Tried Hannibal but I got bored. I may try again. I hear good things but after three episodes I was bored.

Da Vinci’s Demons is garbage. Just awful. Couldn’t get through one episode.

Vegas

Vegas was interesting but it got lost along the way. It’s hard to maintain two main storylines each w/ its own secondary stories and then introduce a mystery each week. The mobsters or the ranchers (turned lawmen)? But to be honest, the best parts of the show were the murder mysteries, the police procedural. The rest of the show gets lost in too many characters and subplots.

And I don’t know what happened to Warehouse 13 but it just plain sucks now. I still watch it because I’m loyal but… did someone important leave? cause it got bad.

The New

Just started trying to catch up with Bates Motel and I’m liking it so far.

Bates Motel

Vera Farmiga is scary good.

Then there are three new Brit shows I started watching…

Utopia is a conspiracy thriller that is holding my attention and creeping the hell out of me.

Black Mirror is a Twilight Zone type science fiction show with outrageously good writing and stories about technology in the not-too-distant future.

and BBC America’s Orphan Black is a sci-fi medical thriller about a group of clones trying to learn the truth about their existence.

All three are kind of trippy and dark at times but oh so good.

Arrow

I really enjoyed Arrow on the CW but for the life of me I don’t know why.

Stephen Amell as Arrow

And I started watching Defiance. It is very interesting. The jury is still out but I’m still in.

The Departed

30 Rock ended well. They came back to form for the last season. Loved that show

The Office also came back into form for their last season.

Jim and Pam

Pam & Jim Forever.

Don’t Trust the B in Apt 23 was cancelled. I knew ABC couldn’t hang. But I bet if it were an hour-long soap opera like Scandal or Revenge they would have considered renewing it.

Spartacus was okay up to the last three episodes which I didn’t like at all.

and speaking of great shows that ended poorly…

Fringe: The Final Season was amazing, fucking amazing up to the very last episode which was chock full of holes, inconsistencies and continuity mistakes. What a horrible way to end a fantastic show.

But you know what ended really well? Merlin ended really well.

Loved that show. It will be missed.

And that’s all he wrote.

– Mel

No words

Every day I wake up and I don’t write
Just like yesterday
And the day before
I don’t write

But somehow I expect to find
Words and paragraphs and pages on my computer
Or in my notebook
sitting next to my typewriter

But they are never there

And I don’t know why.

10 Random Things…

My mind hasn’t been working well of late. The closer we get to election day the more worried I get about.. stuff. So I haven’t been able to string words together in any sort of coherent sentences but I don’t want to neglect my blog for too long. So…

Here are 10 random things that have made me smile over the last month besides the fact that a bunch of my favorite shows are back (Fringe, The Walking Dead, Homeland etc etc) and that I’ve been feeling consistently healthier (if that’s a sentence).

To the list.

1. Eggs

Still looking for new things to do with eggs. I started doing scrambled w/ garlic sprinkling parmigiana over the top and dipping it in ketchup. I can’t stop eating this devilish concoction. Also over easy eggs with hot sauce like on the opening sequence of Dexter. (yes I started doing that after watching Dexter. So, I’m not that original)

2. Nashville on ABC

After three episodes I’m hooked on this country music industry drama because the music is so good. This show would not work without great music. T. Bone Burnett is the Executive Music Producer and he is the man when it comes to good Country & Bluegrass. And all the actors can sing.

I called it Smash meets Revenge after one episode but there are some other subplots developing that seem interesting. And I think Hayden Panettiere is incredibly beautiful and a pretty decent singer.

She is just a pint-sized hottie. It has a great cast. But the best thing about it is/are the songs.

3. The Nerdist Podcast

I like listening to these guys get into the nerdy side of whatever their guest is promoting. Their approach to stuff is more like the way I approach stuff. I want to know how they work and all the little details. They really get in there. And I like the three hosts. Chris Hardwick put together I nice nerdy panel. They are all funny and they are all smart and they are all inquisitive. Loving The Nerdist Channel’s audio shows but I haven’t found a video show that I like except maybe All-Star Celebrity Bowling.

4. The Mindy Project on FOX

The show is very simple. Its got a plot & premise or whatever but that doesn’t matter. It’s Mindy’s world. Mindy’s brain. Mindy’s thing. Her project. So if you like Mindy Kaling you’ll like this show… and I love her. Great, funny, silly, cute show.

5. Binge Masturbation

I haven’t had a date in a while and it’s not good for guys to go too long without… um… blast off.  However masturbation gets boring after a bit. But after a month or two of not doing it, all of  a sudden every little thing turns me on. I can spend a couple of days just getting it out of my system.

Binge Masturbation: Because when you live alone, there’s no one to complain about your 5th and 6th showers of the day.

6. My Cat Lucy’s new favorite spot

She’s getting up there in age and her new favorite spot is on my chest. I think she likes the warmth. She waits until I get into my recliner and I put on a movie or a game or whatever and lean back in the chair then she climbs on my chest and falls asleep. It’s so damn cute. I only have to wake her to go to the bathroom.

7. Elementary on CBS

I’m enjoying this version of Sherlock Holmes. Mostly for the great cast but I also like the stories. It hasn’t been the gun shooting, chase scene riddled procedural that I thought it would be and I’m pleased. I also love the relationship between the stars. Lucy Liu’s Watson is a great character and she’s a great actor. Jonny Lee Miller’s on edge, strung-out, fragile, self-doubting Holmes is an interesting departure from the totally in control, total control freaks in the recent British versions.

It’s no where near as good as the Steven Moffat show but I like it alot and I hope it stays around. (you know what else is enjoyable on CBS… Vegas with Michael Chiklis & Dennis Quaid. It’s pretty good)

8. Facebook Games

I keep playing these damn games. They are just so addictive, though I wish Facebook had a better chess app. Each month I find another little game that I add to my list of time-wasters. And when my list gets too long I have to say goodbye to some of my older faves. That’s always sad. Right now I’m liking Song Pop & Marvel’s Avengers Alliance and I’m playing a lot of Solitaire Blitz but they took away the Extra Cards power-up & made it harder, so I may be dropping that one.

9. Twitter in an Election Year

There’s not a lot I can say except that if not for Twitter and MSNBC, I would have screamed myself hoarse at the sheer amount of stupidity, racism, hatred, lying and blatant & senseless misogyny in this years’ election. Thank you Twitter for keeping me relatively sane.

10. Herbal Teas

Herbal Tea

 

And finally there is Herbal Teas. I drink the Celestial Seasonings brand of herbal teas because that’s what they carry at my local market. I’ve always been a late night muncher. I like to munch. But it’s not because I’m hungry. It’s because I’m bored. So instead, I drink tea. Green Tea, Chamomile Tea or one of the blends. I have maintained a healthy weight and it helps to keep me hydrated. Loving the teas.

And that’s my list. These are the things that are making me happy these days.

What makes you happy?

– Mel