What’s Good? (End of Summer… Spring 2017) Mega Post

Hello, dear readers.

I’ve been away. But I’m back now. Sorry about the wait.

“We missed you soooo much.”

Okay. Yeah. So I haven’t been on social media a bunch of late. I’ve been working on the way I relate to it. I’m addicted in a bad way. Addicted to likes. Addicted to views. And while it’s now no longer my only connection to the outside world, it serves an important purpose in my life and I’ve grown to like a lot of the people I’ve met on here.

You had me at hello, Tom?  “No.”

Especially people who follow and interact with my blog (you know who you are). And while I haven’t quite figured out how I will reconcile this, I have found that the people I meet in the real world (now that I go outside more often) aren’t really as interested in talking about movies and TV shows and books and games as you guys. So I think I’m here to stay. I just have to curb my attachment and stay away from politics.

“Did you get to the part where he says he’s gonna stay away from politics online? Isn’t that the cutest thing? Bless his heart.” “There’s no way.” “No fucking way.” “So cute with his little plans.”

While I’ve been offline, I’ve been watching a lot of good TV. And I also saw a lot of movies (good and bad). Thinking about it though, I haven’t read a book in years. (I don’t know what the fuck’s up with that). And as far as video games go… shit, I’m still trying to finish the first Bioshock (don’t judge me).

“No judgement. You suck at video games. Not a judgement. Just a fact.”

But anyway, there is so much good stuff to talk about from the Spring and the Summer just from TV and movies. So let’s get right to it.

But why don’t we get the bad stuff out of the way first this time around shall we?.

“You mean… that?”

Here’s a top ten list of the movies that I saw on my break that were pure shit.

THE WORST

Counting down…

10. Spider-man: Homecoming

Okay. That wasn’t Spider-man. Spider-man was in Captain America: Civil War. Russo Brothers gave us Spider-man. Whatever that was in Homecoming, I don’t know. Trying to start over with the web head learning how to use his powers is one thing. Having him hold his own against Captain America, Bucky, Falcon, et al and then having him go back to being inept is just confusing. Nope. Did not like what they did to my friendly neighborhood Spider-man.

9. Assasssin’s Creed

Ass-Ass-In’s Creed is fucking awful (double ass in). How could they not have known? Great action sequences and cool fights but little else. Confusing and infuriating and disappointing. (I absolutely love the video game series though even though I suck)

8. Sing

Let’s call this one Ringtones: The Movie (they cut off every song before they would have had to pay for it). This movie is annoyingly bad. And for a music lover, frustratingly music-less. Three second clips don’t make a musical. They make a medley.

7. Personal Shopper

Kristen Stewart is decent but the movie is boring as fuck. It doesn’t know what it wants to be. A thriller? A supernatural tear-jerker? A mystery? A stalker drama? A supernatural murder psycho stalker drama? Personal Shopper spends way too much time texting itself and not enough time making love to Kristen Stewart. This is like if Brian De Palma made a movie while he was asleep. Just directed the whole thing from bed. Never bothering to wake up at all. Personal Shopper was booed at film festivals and it’s easy to tell why. The main character spends most of the movie on her phone. Booooooooo.

6. The Dark Tower

Here is another perfect example of a movie that doesn’t know what it wants to be and just ends up being nothing. Is it sci-fi… horror? Is it for kids? Is it not? Make up your damn mind. The film-makers have forgotten the faces of their fathers. (Steven Spielberg, James Cameron, Ridley Scott, Stanley Kubrick… [The paterFILMilias])

5. Resident Evil: The Final Chapter vs Underworld: Blood Wars

I was going to do a film comparison game show of these two films because they are essentially the same movie. But I got bored because they both sucked ass… equally. If they don’t do a crossover then they have no idea how completely similar these franchises have become to each other.

4. Colossal

Great idea but horrible ending. Anne Hathaway is fantastic as always but the ending of Colossal is so damn sloppy. It ruins what was good about it in the first place. Worth a look but prepare to be let down by the end.

3. Silence

Long, boring, confusing and racist as hell. I appreciate the artistry of Martin Scorcese but every time he does a movie about religion he seems to lose his fucking mind. Silence is so fucking racist. And there is not a character in it who has a basic understanding of either religion. I hate the movie Silence. And I wish it didn’t exist. I’m angry with everyone responsible for making me sit through it. The film-makers, the actors and the historical figures. Fuck em all.

Missionaries are awful racist people with awful racist agendas in places they should not be. Awful. To call the evil that these awful people encountered as being done by Buddhists is a new kind of evil. Those Buddhists are as much Buddhists as these racist missionaries are Christians. I hope they all burn in the hell of the other’s religion. That would be Karma. If you don’t understand what Karma is, Marty, Google it. That would also be irony. And if you… you know what, just look it up. Look everything up.

2. XXX: The Return of Xander Cage

XXX The Return of Vin Diesel is an international mess. Culminating in an appearance by Ice Cube at the end where he’s not even in the same country as the other actors who are in the same shot as him and it’s so annoyingly obvious and bad. The writing is bad. The acting is bad. The stunts are unnecessary and the fight choreography is impractical. XXX is fucking awful.

And the number one worst movie I saw this Spring and Summer was…

1. The Mummy (2017)

Swing and a miss. Honestly. How do you have Tom Cruise in your film and then not give him a character to play. Who the fuck is he? Also, is he comic relief? Is he anti-hero? Is he romantic lead? What the fuck? There is nothing good about The Mummy. It is confusing and over-simplified. How can a movie be this boring while at the same time being non-stop mindless action sequences. How did they even accomplish that?

Okay that’s over with. You can breathe now. The worst part is done.

Those movies were bad. Just set them all on fire and start over.

Burn Bitches

Moving over to the small screen for a second…

There was a lot of good TV this Spring & Summer. Here are a few honorable mentions.

Doctor Who came back with a new companion and although this was the weakest season of the new series, it was still ambitious and entertaining. I enjoyed Peter Capaldi’s Doctor even though he “petered out” toward the end. And I am really excited about the gender switch. I hope that’s why this season was so weak. They were saving the best stories to introduce the new Doctor.

The Leftovers ended its run just as strong as it started. This was a hugely satisfying series that took on some major taboo religious subjects and didn’t get all holy and preachy and in fact was always amazingly non-denominational and spiritually trippy. Very good show.

Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD gets a bad rap. I love this show. I enjoy the way every half season of this show has a different feel and theme. Drastically different from anything they’d done before. I love the characters and I love the quality of the writing. And of course the Fitz-Simmons love story is still getting the full Joss Whedon treatment. Meaning it’s FUCKING BRUTAL.

Fargo was sensational yet again. Here is an anthology series that keeps it tight while still being fucking insane. There were no performances this year like Kirsten Dunst in season two or Billy Bob in season one. but it was still thrilling and immensely entertaining. One of the best shows on TV.

The Americans is consistently good and in my opinion hasn’t lost a step. Things are coming to a head and this season mostly set up the end game but it was still great. Some of the best acting and writing on television.

Gotham is crazy. Crazy good. It wants to be ALL Batman versions at the same time and it does a great job. I really enjoyed the Penguin & Riddler story line this past season. I really liked the actress who played the young Poison Ivy but I’m fine with her having “sprouted” so to speak.

Sense 8 wasn’t as good as the first season and then it lost its Netflix funding. It’s an expensive show. Shot on location in several countries at once. Still one of the coolest concepts around but we can expect a finale movie and that’s it for Sense 8 (single tear). Season two was still quite enjoyable. Even if it had no chance to live up to the amazing first season of this sci-fi action drama.

Preacher is frustrating. I have to say, the first season of Preacher, the supernatural comic based crazy fest, really pissed me off. I couldn’t stop watching but it annoyed me, while still being intriguing and annoying and cool and annoying. The second season is a thousand times better, keeps the cool, drops the annoying. Well done guys.

Bosch continued its quality storytelling. This is a gritty procedural and murder mystery detective show with fantastic performances. If you haven’t seen it. Check it out. It’s very good. High on the cool factor. Like Justified meets True Detective.

Dark Matter wasn’t at its best this season either. There were a little too many running story lines and very little character development. But I still love these characters. Still love this show. And the character Porsche Lynn (or Number Two if you will) is a straight up goddess. Definitely wifey material. Just hot as all hell.

*And I just learned that they’ve cancelled it. YOU BASTARDS!!!

But anyway, that’s not why we came.

Those TV shows were entertaining but not the best. That’s not what’s good.

Here comes the best stuff now. I’m just gonna need for you to ask me the question before we get started… You know the one.

“What’s Good, Motherfucker?”

Don’t be shy. Say it out loud.

What’s Good?

I’m glad you asked.

Bring on the good shit.

THE BEST MOVIES

Zootopia (Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures)

Directed by Byron Howard & Rich Moore

Written by Byron Howard, Rich Moore, Jared Bush, Jim Reardon, Josie Trinidad, Phil Johnston & Jennifer Lee

Starring Ginnifer GoodwinJason BatemanIdris ElbaJenny SlateNate TorrenceBonnie HuntDon LakeTommy ChongJ. K. SimmonsOctavia SpencerAlan Tudyk & Shakira

Zootopia is a very good movie about racism and prejudice using cartoon animals to make its poignant points. We do a meditation in my Tibetan Buddhist class that imagines all sentient beings living in peace and compassion. By all sentient beings we mean animals too. It’s a difficult thing to imagine soberly. So for me I always default to cartoon animals in movies like this where different species live and work together and don’t eat each other. Something that really shouldn’t be that hard to contemplate seriously.

If humans had spent their time solving problems for peace on the planet instead of making problems for profit these last few thousand years, we could have created the very balance that I have to imagine as a cartoon. Oh my god. I’ve really gotten off on a tangent, haven’t I? Zootopia is a good movie. If you haven’t seen it… do.

Office Christmas Party (Paramount Pictures)

Directed by Will Speck & Josh Gordon

Written by Jon LucasScott MooreTimothy Dowling and Justin Malen, Laura Solon, & Dan Mazer

Starring Jason BatemanOlivia MunnT. J. MillerJillian BellVanessa BayerCourtney B. VanceRob CorddryKate McKinnon & Jennifer Aniston

Office Christmas party is a funny movie with a talented and very funny cast. I usually don’t like your basic make it up as you go improvisational comedy but this one has a great cast, like I said, and they keep it fun and funny and really enjoyable. They’re all extremely likable and good at their jobs.

Kate McKinnon (from Saturday Night Live) is really coming into her own comically. (She’s the best thing about the horrible Rough Night and probably the only reason it doesn’t make the worst list). Olivia Munn, Jason Bateman (more from him later. HINT [It’s Ozark. Ozark is so good. I can’t keep a secret]) T.J. Miller (from Silicon Valley) and Jennifer Aniston are in their respective wheelhouses here and they make the movie surprisingly good. Rent it.

Paterson (Amazon Studios)

Written & Directed by Jim Jarmusch

Starring Adam DriverGolshifteh FarahaniBarry Shabaka HenleyCliff Smith, Chasten Harmon, William Jackson Harper & Masatoshi Nagase

Paterson is actually pretty good for a movie where nothing much really happens. Jim Jarmusch has created a little slice of a man’s life. Paterson is likable and affable and creative and his girlfriend is really creative and they are a fun couple to watch. Paterson drives a bus in Paterson New Jersey and he writes poetry in his notebook. He’s very Zen and very nice and while there are things that happen around him, he stays centered and it is enjoyable to watch.

His girlfriend, however, is a different kind of creative. She is a painter and a fashion designer and… I don’t know, a country music singer or something. They are an interesting pair. Paterson is a good movie. If you like James Joyce, you’ll like Paterson. It is a week in the life of an everyday creative, bar patron, dog-owning, bus driving romantic. Jim Jarmusch has done it again.

John Wick: Chapter 2 (Summit Entertainment)

Directed by Chad Stahelski

Written by Derek Kolstad

Starring Keanu Reeves, CommonLaurence FishburneRiccardo ScamarcioRuby RoseJohn Leguizamo & Ian McShane

Same old John Wick. This time the movie is a little light on substance. Not that the first one was deep or anything but I think I liked his motivation in the first movie more. They took his dog. However we don’t watch John Wick for the story. Do we? We watch it for the amazing Gun-Fu and John Wick Chapter 2 does not disappoint.

There are some epic battles in this movie. John Wick is wall to wall fight choreography much like the Raid martial arts movies (especially Raid Redemption). If you liked the first John Wick for the story. You may not like the second one. But also… what?

CHiPs (Warner Bros. Pictures)

Written & Directed by Dax Shepard  Based on CHiPs by Rick Rosner

Starring Dax Shepard, Michael PeñaRosa SalazarAdam BrodyRichard T. JonesKristen Bell & Vincent D’Onofrio

I read on the net that no one liked this movie. I don’t see why. It is what it is. And what it is… turns out to be very fucking funny. CHiPs is a lot of fun. It’s a little silly but with a really good heart. It is a direct reflection of its writer & director. Big, silly, good-natured, a little dumb, a little goofy (and married to one of the hottest women on the planet).

I enjoyed CHiPs because of the two stars; the amazing Michael Pena, who made Ant-man so funny, and the writer, director and star, Dax Shepherd. The two leads make the movie immensely enjoyable. And even though a few plot points are monumentally stupid, they are easily forgiven because of how good-natured and fun CHiPs turns out to be. I recommend it. It’s a fun and funny movie.

If someone told you that a movie based on the incredibly stupid TV show CHiPs was not going to be dumb, they lied to you. This is exactly what a CHiPs movie should be.

Kong: Skull Island (Warner Bros. Pictures)

Directed by Jordan Vogt-Roberts

Written by Dan GilroyMax BorensteinDerek Connolly, and John Gatins  Based on King Kong by Merian C. Cooper & Edgar Wallace

Starring Tom HiddlestonSamuel L. JacksonJohn GoodmanBrie LarsonJing TianToby KebbellJohn OrtizCorey HawkinsJason MitchellShea WhighamThomas MannTerry NotaryJohn C. Reilly

Wow what a great movie. Kong is a popcorn adventure with a great cast and story and some kick ass action. One of the best movies of the year. The soundtrack is phenomenal. The cinematography is gorgeous. It’s a throwback to the old monster movies and war films. One of the best over-sized monster flicks in a long long time.

Kong: Skull Island is like a cross between Apocalypse Now and Godzilla v Megalon. Skull Island is sensational. I was not expecting it to be as good as it is. And it plays itself down by not taking itself too seriously but that just adds to how good it is.

Kong: Skull Island is a sensationally fucking good movie.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 (Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures)

Written & Directed by James Gunn  Based on Guardians of the Galaxy by Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning

Starring Chris PrattZoe SaldanaDave BautistaVin DieselBradley CooperMichael RookerKaren GillanPom KlementieffElizabeth DebickiChris SullivanSean GunnSylvester Stallone & Kurt Russell

I am Groot. I am Groot. I am Groot. This is not your older brothers Guardians of the Galaxy. There was no godly way they could ever match the first film. This is the sophomore jinx at its worst. But it’s still a good movie. A lot more character development than you’d expect from a big budget blockbuster. And a lot of heart.

Volume 2 of the franchise is primarily about family. Fathers and Sons, Sisters, and Brothers in Arms. It’s a good movie considering that it will always be the lesser of the two cinematic siblings. But don’t talk to me about the music. There were a lot better 70s songs to choose from and the only stand out this time is Fleetwood Mac’s The Chain which is over-used. Still it’s good. Really it is.

Atomic Blonde (Focus Features)

Directed by David Leitch

Written by Kurt Johnstad  Based on The Coldest City by Antony Johnston & Sam Hart

Starring Charlize Theron, James McAvoy & John Goodman

Atomic Blonde is an epic spy thriller with some of the best fight sequences since The Bourne Identity. Charlize Theron is amazing. Like with John Wick, there isn’t a lot here except the kick-ass action. But that’s all you need.

Atomic Blonde fucks shit up. It also has one of the best 80s soundtracks around. The music plays a major role in the movie that takes place around the falling of the Berlin wall between the two halves of Germany at the end of the cold war.

As with all (good) spy thrillers, there’s a lot of twists and turns and intrigue and double and triple crosses and sexy sexiness and it is far from perfect but still pretty fucking good. And again, the fight scenes are amazing. Truly truly spectacular.

Wonder Woman (Warner Bros. Pictures)

What? You think I wasn’t gonna talk about it.

Directed by Patty Jenkins

Written by Allan Heinberg  and Zack Snyder and Jason Fuchs  Based on Wonder Woman by William Moulton Marston

Starring Gal GadotChris PineRobin WrightDanny HustonDavid ThewlisConnie Nielsen & Elena Anaya

Yes yes yes. Wonder Woman is the best thing since sliced bread… if sliced bread made you shit money the next morning. The bar was lowered by what came before it but honestly it didn’t have to be. I’ve seen the movie several times and it’s just a really good movie. Crowd-pleasing and exciting and fun and it doesn’t talk down to its audience. And yes it also had to make a lot of money to make sure that we get more like this and it has. It continues to break records. Do not hate it because it’s beautiful.

Wonder Woman did very well. So the Amazonians had to be more sexy than fierce. It had to have a big superhero ending. And if I’m reading the tea leaves correctly, I think this may save Warner Bros from itself and its massive “bro” attitude. I think they’re going to try to be a little more women friendly with their comic book movies.

Maybe they’ll give Lois Lane a bigger role next time around. I hear they’re making a Harley Quinn & The Joker movie. (The Sid and Nancy of comic book villains will get their own title). And they’re allowing Joss Whedon to do some character based re-shoots of Justice League to add more heart and give Wonder Woman a more central and leading role. These are all good things. because you know 300 boy, Zack Snyder, isn’t known for anything but testosterone based action. So Joss is the best thing to ever happen to DC and Warner. And I’m excited.

And yes yes yes, Wonder Woman is a very good movie. But at this point you really didn’t need me to tell you that. Do you?

Valerian and The City of a Thousand Planets (STX Entertainment)

Written & Directed by Luc Besson  Based on Valérian and Laureline
by Pierre Christin & Jean-Claude Mézières

Starring Dane DeHaanCara DelevingneClive OwenRihannaEthan HawkeHerbie HancockKris Wu & Rutger Hauer

Okay this is a tough one. Valerian and Laureline (what the movie should actually be called) is a well written and beautifully cinematic and picturesque space adventure. It reminds me of Fifth Element in a lot of ways. And it would be just as good if not for the bad casting. The casting is bad. They went for youth over experience this time around and the movie suffers because of it. The two stars have ZERO chemistry in their original language, Though they are fun to look at.

But I’m including it with my good movies because it can still be good with a little work on your part. Yes I’m talking to you.  I’m going to let you in on a little trade secret. All it takes to make this movie go from crappy to pretty fucking good is to watch a foreign language dub (preferably French)… with English subtitles. You’re welcome.

You see, sometimes when a director is working in a language that is his second or third, they can, while paying attention to stunts and marks and effects, let bad performances and crappy line readings slip through. A lot of it is left up to the performer. This isn’t Gary Oldman and Bruce Willis. This is two kids who made really bad decisions. So turn off their voices. Listen to the French (better line readings) and read the English subtitles. Now these two have gone from whiny little brats to cool young prodigies with just a flip of the switch. Again… you’re welcome.

Now somebody hand me the fucking remote…

“There it is again.”

This is where the good shit lives.

THE BEST TELEVISION

Turn: Washington’s Spies (AMC)

Based on Washington’s Spies: The Story of America’s First Spy Ring by Alexander Rose

Developed by Craig Silverstein

This brilliant show only lasted four seasons but we knew it wouldn’t be around long. it was about the American Revolutionary war. We know how that ended. We know when that ended. They didn’t drag it out. Four seasons. It was perfect.

I talk about TURN a lot because it’s really that fucking good. Turn: Washington’s Spies might have a strange name but it is one of the best shows in TV history. Fantastic from start to finish. This is one to binge and dive into head first, feet first, ass first, whatever.

The characters are amazing. The situations are suspenseful. This is some early American spy craft, thriller, drama, espionage shit. And some of the best writing and coolest story telling around.

American Gods (STARZ)

Based on American Gods by Neil Gaiman

Developed by Bryan Fuller & Michael Green

American Gods is sensational. I don’t know if you know this about me but I am a polytheist from way back. My step-father (I refer to him most of the time as my father) was a worshiper of the old gods. The Egyptian gods and also the gods of the east. He knew them all. And he knew what they wanted from us in order to make them dance. I always respected that. There was a lot of power in the old gods. They made themselves known. Most people I meet are still waiting for Allah to say something. Still waiting for Jehovah to open his mouth. The so-called ONE gods. You don’t have to wait for them.

In fact I believe there are more gods than there are humans. Let me repeat that. I firmly believe that there are more gods NOW than there were ever human beings on the planet. But anyway. That’s not why you come here. (or is it?)

Do you guys like it when I start talking about spiritual stuff? Or am I just making you uncomfortable? I guess it doesn’t matter. It wouldn’t stop me either way.

But seriously, I love this show. I love Neil Gaiman. He’s responsible for several of my favorite fictional worlds. And responsible for some of my favorite TV shows (and Doctor Who episodes and comic books).

But American Gods is so fucking good, it’s like… It’s like… Well it’s like it was made by the gods. I would not be surprised if Neil Gaiman were a demi-god himself.

The Tick (Amazon)

Based on The Tick by Ben Edlund

Created by Ben Edlund

The Tick is one of my favorite absurdist comic superheroes. He’s an indestructible good guy with not much in the way of brains but the purest heart one can have. Ben Edlund created a character and a world that is and has been the source of hours and hours of amusement for me. The animated series was amazing. The first live action series was amazing. And this too is amazing.

However Ben has pulled a fast one on us and only released half of the first season. he doesn’t like binge watching and well he’s done something about it. FUCK YOU BEN!!! Please put out the second half of the first season, you incredibly talented pain-in-the-ass. No seriously I love you. I love you madly.

Now stop being such a dick.

Fleabag (Amazon)

Created by and Starring Phoebe Waller-Bridge

Fleabag is sensational and heartbreaking and funny and not funny and well-acted and well-written and so fucking good it hurts. And it also hurts because it hurts. It hurts.

First you fall in love with the character and then… and then you get to know her. And Fuck. You’re already in love with her. Fuck. What a great show. I swear I went to High School with this girl. You know who I’m talking about.

The Handmaid’s Tale (Hulu)

Based on The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood

Created by Bruce Miller

I get that it’s not as good as the book. The Handmaid’s Tale is one of my favorite books. A bit dated now. So if you’re reading it now you might ask now how is this so different from what we have now. And I might answer by screaming until my voice went out and then silently screaming until my jaw locked up and then quietly crying until my eyes went blind. And then banging my head until I passed out.

These fuckers made reading uncool. Nobody reads anymore. And now we’re stuck in Margaret Atwood’s The Handmaid’s Tale and George Orwell’s 1984 and slowly sliding into Ray Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451 because nobody reads those fucking books.

Game of Thrones (HBO)

Based on A Song of Ice and Fire by George R. R. Martin

Created by David Benioff & D. B. Weiss

This season of Game of Thrones was satisfying as all hell. So good. You know what I’m talking about. I started watching reaction videos on YouTube just to see other people see what I saw when I saw that awesome shit. So incredibly satisfying.

Game of Thrones has gotten so good since they caught up with the books and they don’t have to wait for George to write. Hell…  you want to know what’s taking him so long. He’s sitting in a dark room crying to himself. Realizing they made something better than he could ever do. Sorry Martin fans.

And it is my understanding that most of what happens in the last two books will be different than what we see on the small screen. But really why bother George. Why bother. The show is amazing.

Book fans, hate me all you want. But really I don’t give a fuck. I probably won’t read the books anyway. Reading is for suckers. You heard me. (and yes I heard myself).

The Defenders (Netflix)

Based on  Daredevil by Stan Lee & Bill Everett  Jessica Jones by Brian Michael Bendis & Michael Gaydos  Luke Cage by Archie GoodwinGeorge TuskaRoy Thomas & John Romita Sr.  Iron Fist by Roy Thomas & Gil Kane

Created by Douglas Petrie & Marco Ramirez

One of the best things I’ve seen this year so far. The Defenders did not disappoint.

I especially loved Jessica Jones and the way she made fun of Danny and Daredevil. The Defenders was the right amount of light-hearted fun and action. Because I don’t know if you’ve noticed, the Netflix Marvel shows are pretty heavy on the heaviness.

I’m hoping The Defenders will be the occasional respite from all the drama, plus some kick-ass team-up action. Now bring on Jessica 2 and Daredevil 3… and Luke 2 and believe it or not I wouldn’t mind seeing Fist 2. The Defenders even made Iron Fist better.

Halt and Catch Fire (AMC)

Created by Christopher Cantwell & Christopher C. Rogers

One of the best shows on currently, in its fourth season (but honestly you can start any where) with some of my favorite characters on TV. Like Mad Men for the computer age, Halt and Catch Fire is some of the best drama on TV.

I love these characters. Joe and Cameron especially are amazing but so are the other three. AMC makes good TV. Like HBO good but without the fee. I love this show.

Ozark (Netflix)

Created by Bill Dubuque & Mark Williams

These next two shows are the best things I’ve seen in ages. Artistry level in the brilliant spectrum. Ozark is like if Breaking Bad started in the middle. You know. When shit was already crazy. Jason Bateman has created an amazing crime drama.

Ozark is phenomenal. Great acting. Great writing. Superb directing. Start lining up the awards. Ozark is going to sweep. I kid you not. It is as good as Breaking Bad (of course Breaking Bad was consistently good and this is just Ozark’s first season) and Breaking Bad was the best thing to ever appear on a television set since its invention.

Don’t sleep on Ozark. It’s pretty damn good. That’s an under-statement. Jason Bateman launders money for the Mexican mob and… It’s one of the best things I’ve seen in a long time. Watch Ozark before it wins all the awards and everybody’s pretending they been watching it from the start.

I Love Dick (Amazon)

Based on I Love Dick by Chris Kraus

Created by Sarah Gubbins & Jill Soloway

I Love Dick is not a TV show. It is an art installation. It is a sexual and sensual performance that is hard to watch and at the same time makes you hard while you watch it. It is juicy. I’m sorry if that word offends your sensibilities.

Juicy like a ripe melon. Juicy like a plucked peach being slowly peeled. (Do we peel peaches or am I mixing metaphors?). Juicy like the first bite. The first damn bite of anything. The first bite of fucking ANYTHING. But it’s not a TV show. So it doesn’t belong on this list. Ozark is the best TV show. I Love Dick is something else entirely.

I need you to force yourself to watch I Love Dick. I need you to tie yourself to the bed and watch it all. Take it all. I Love Dick. Say it. I Love Dick. Take it all.

You can thank me later.

Or don’t.

I don’t care.

Do what you want.

———————————————-

And that’s it. That’s all for the Summer (and Spring)

Fall TV shows are back. But of course they’re not just Fall shows. They’re Fall Winter Spring TV shows. The CW heroes are back. Dirk Gently is starting up again. FOX has got a couple of sci-fi and comic book shows that they will undoubtedly cancel before it’s even next year. It’s god damn FOX.

And before you know it, the Christmas movies will open and just you try to keep me from blogging about them. Go ahead. No wait. Don’t. That won’t end well for anyone.

Right, Jess?

Just click the like button and we’ll call it even.

I’m so addicted.

– Mel

 

“Y’all got any more of them likes?”

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Sense 8 Christmas Special (god bless us… every one)

So yeah I didn’t know this was happening. It’s like a Christmas miracle.

You guys know how much I loved Sense 8… well

Check this shit out.

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMFG

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMFG

It looks like it’s gonna be sappy… but like in a really good way.

I know what I’m doing the week between Christmas and New Years (AKA the year’s taint, AKA the dead zone, AKA the darkest week of the darkest year of the darkest timeline)

Watching This…

then The Doctor Who Christmas Special

And then this again and then Doctor Who again

And then…

– Mel

Fall TV Supplemental (or Ten More Shows I Forgot To Mention)

I put up a What’s Good with Fall TV shows Mega Post not too long ago but it was hard to post it because I couldn’t stop adding shows to it. Finally I just put the thing up and of course I forgot some shows. So here’s a supplemental to talk about those shows.

I stopped at ten. (It sounded like a nice round number)

Let’s get right to it.

Into the Badlands (AMC)

Into The Badlands

Into The Badlands is a martial arts show in a strange world with barons and factions and no real logic but some of the best fight choreography on TV.

Daniel Wu

I tried to like this show because the fight choreography is so damn good. But nothing else is. The costumes are the most egregious thing. They are so crisp. They look awkward. Attention wardrobe department: If a character owns clothing, they sometimes wear them. Only royalty can have crisp clean clothes each day. Like someone just made them that outfit for that day. Everybody else’s clothes should look lived in. It’s annoying.

Into The Badlands Cast

But also the fashion is awkward. With unnecessary collars and rips. The costumes are terrible. But then again, so is the acting and the writing and the premise. The only good thing about the show are the fights. And honestly the fight scenes are so good that it’s worth watching for the fights. So if they bring this back, I will still watch because the fights are so good. Too bad they didn’t have anything to go with them. I really wanted to like it.

Doctor Who (BBCA)

Doctor Who

Doctor Who took a strange turn this season when the Doctor experienced a crisis of conscience. And started acting silly again. He gives away his sonic screw driver and settles back into being a clown by inventing sonic sunglasses and running away from his problems. He meets a boy in danger who will one day be his greatest enemy and the doctor decides to not save him. Just to run.

Peter Capaldi as The Doctor.

The season saw the end of two of the doctor’s most controversial companions and featured outstanding performances by Peter Capaldi. I can’t wait until next season.

Downton Abbey (PBS)

Downton Abbey

This season was nice and sweet and Downton Abbey-ish but the finale of the series was bittersweet. I’m going to miss these characters. Even though I have absolutely nothing in common with any of them they still felt like family. I really enjoyed the series. And it’s not my usual cup of tea but the characters were very real and the whole thing felt familiar even as it was completely alien to me.

The Expanse (SyFy)

The Expanse

What can I say? I like this show. It has the exact amount of space opera and political intrigue and science fiction goodness that I like. The acting is decent and the good performances sell the premise. It’s always the worst when bad actors make it hard to believe the sci-fi dialogue and it sounds all hokey, like the actors don’t quite believe it.

Thomas Jane in The Expanse

The Expanse is a well-acted and well-written sci-fi drama. I see good things on the horizon as long as they don’t get too ahead of themselves. There’s Mars, Earth, The Belt and possibly a fourth faction and that’s good enough. Let’s get deeper into these groups and their internal dynamics and their relationships.

The Expanse Crew

I have high hopes for this show. I really do. And I really like this crew. These guys rock.

Childhood’s End (SyFy)

Childhoods End

Chapter one of Childhood’s End was freaking phenomenal. I thought I was in for three nights of great entertainment after that. Especially after the reveal at the end of the first act. That was gloriously unexpected and surreal.

But chapter two was significantly worse and disjointed and confused. It never lived up to the first installment. And if it was half as good as the first (and I’m being generous) Chapter three was again half as good as that.

Childhood's End

The series ended with a thud when it started with a bang. So very disappointing. Ruined the whole thing.

Hemlock Grove (Netflix)

Hemlock Grove

Hemlock Grove is one those shows that I don’t talk about much but I really like. It’s weird. So it’s an acquired taste. Another monster mash. With vampires and werewolves and a Frankenstein-like creation. I enjoyed it thoroughly. The actors were hot. The premises were creepy and sometimes scary and very cool. And it’s over now. But it was pretty good. Definitely not for every one. But right up my alley with shows like Penny Dreadful and True Blood. I’m going to miss Hemlock Grove.

Master of None (Netflix)

Master of None

I really liked Master of None. And I’m not just NOT an Aziz Ansari fan. I hate him with a passion (The red hot passion of a thousand suns).  He was the worst thing about Parks & Rec. His stand-up is whiny and douche-y. But I really enjoyed his Netflix show.

Netflix Master of None

The writing reminded me at times of Louie (Louis CK’s show) and the episode that Aziz directs (the one with the two dads) was spectacular. One of the best episodes of a great first season. He’s a very talented man. But the funniest thing about all of this is that, after watching this award worthy and amazing show, that stars him, is written by him and sometimes directed by him, I still hate him. I really really can’t stand him.

Luther (BBCA)

Luther

Luther’s back and I’m pleased. The show is still as suspenseful as ever. I don’t like that they killed off Alice but you know Alice. She won’t stay dead. It’s Alice. Without Ruth Wilson, Luther is not Luther. Don’t get me wrong, Idris Elba is great and he’s still got that huge manly hotness but Ruth Wilson makes the show for me.

The Daily Show with Trevor Noah (Comedy)

The Daily Show with Trevor Noah

This new guy is very funny, likable and good-looking. And I’ve said many times over the last couple of years that Jon was phoning it in by the end. So Trevor has also injected the show with new energy and life and I’m digging it again. Once again The Daily Show is must-see, required viewing. And as is usually the case with a new talk show host, they are shit at the interviews, but Trevor isn’t. Trevor is great at interviews. He’s even better than Colbert ever was.

Which reminds me of the Late Show. I stopped watching The Late Show and I loved The Colbert Report but now that Stephen is being himself, he just seems so fake.

The Knick (Cinemax)

The Knick

Steven Soderbergh continues to make marvelous mini movies for every episode of The Knick and they are fantastic. If the series is over, (It seemed like it ended but Cinemax wants more and so do I) then it went out with one of the most dark and disturbing operating scenes of the series.

Operating Room The Knick

The Knick on Cinemax is known for its unflinching look at early 20th century surgery techniques. It gets in there. It gets way in there. It gets gross. It’s hard to watch but so entertaining. I’m not going to give it away but the last scene is to a level that I had no idea they could reach. It… I screamed at my TV through the entire scene. “Don’t do that. Please don’t do that.” and I was talking to the characters. The director. The TV. My eyes. Anyone who would listen. “Please stop doing that.” It was amazing… amazingly disturbing. And something I will not be forgetting any time soon.

The Knick

That’s it for Fall.

Coming Soon (this Winter): Black Sails is back. Also The 100, 12 Monkeys, Banshee, Better Call Saul, Broad City, Colony (I liked the leaked pilot), Legends of Tomorrow (honestly I don’t expect much), Galavant is back (no seriously it’s not as bad as it looks), Game of motherfucking Thrones, Girls (I love that show), Halt & Catch Fire (yay!!!), Hell on Wheels (??), House of Lies, Humans (hell yeah), It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, The Last Ship, Lucifer (loved the pilot but I bet they retooled it), The Magicians (also loved the pilot), The Man in the High Castle (steady, Mel, steady), Agent Carter (yes, ma’am), Daredevil (I’m out of breath), Masters of Sex, Mozart in the Jungle (TODAY!!!), Mr. Robot (okay now you’re just fucking with me, Winter TV shows), Orange is the New Black, Orphan Black, Penny Dreadful, Person of Interest, Portlandia, Ray Donovan, Sense 8 (okay okay I get it. I need another television), Shameless, The Shannara Chronicles, Silcon Valley, Turn: Washington’s Spies, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Veep, Vikings, The Walking Dead, and the new X-Files.

Plus all the old school shows that go from Fall to Summer.

So yeah. Winter shows kick TV’s ass.

– Mel

What’s Good? (Late Summer)

Hello again and welcome to this the fourth What’s Good? installment. A top ten list (without numbers) of things I’m enjoying or have enjoyed recently. In TV, Movies and life and junk. You get the picture. I wish I could do one of these every month but some months, I’m telling ya, ain’t much good. But that’s just my opinion. I don’t want to fight about it. My EmotionsIf you haven’t heard yet, I had a run-in with my local launder/dry cleaner dude and put my foot through two of the panels on his doors. He had me arrested and the whole thing has sent me into a depressive funk. I hadn’t had an incident in more than a decade and I was getting out more. Hitting the museums and stuff. I felt like I was improving. But he said something to me. I said something back and then he said something else and I did what I did. In the past I would’ve punched him. So maybe it should feel like progress. But police, court dates and the fact he’s right on the corner and I’m not allowed to walk that way anymore has sent me to self-pity city (population one). And it goes without saying that self-pity city is pretty shitty. (the reason it goes without saying is… well you try to say it)

StrangeloveAnyway, I don’t want to get you all down too. So I’m gonna talk about the good stuff

We got mostly TV this time around. And the Mets. The Mets are looking really good. And if all goes well I may even talk about Donald Trump. Everybody else in the world is.

To the list…

WHAT’S GOOD?

I’m glad you asked.

The Brink Poster

The Brink on HBO was really good. It was a half hour comedy about the U.S. and Pakistan almost starting world war three. I love Tim Robbins and this has Tim Robbins written all over it. His film Bob Roberts is one of my all time favorites.

Tim Robbins

The Brink stars Jack Black as a government official who gets caught up in an international incident. It’s zany and silly but the messages resonate in our modern society. The fragile state of international diplomacy in the digital world. Very funny and eerily possible. Except the real thing wouldn’t be as comical. Think Dr. Strangelove meets…well  Dr. Strangelove. The Brink is the modern-day Dr. Strangelove. And I loved every minute of it.

Strike Back: Legacy was pretty good. Strike Back is a show that airs on Cinemax in the US. In its fifth season it’s still exciting and they still don’t mind killing off any character at any time. One of the best things about the show is that the main characters get killed off all the time. Nobody is safe. Espionage and military action with the occasional sexiness thrown in for good measure. I mean, it is Cinemax.

Two men playing chess

Chess w/ Friends app is good because I live alone, so I usually play chess against the computer but I’m good, so I’ve burned a few CPU’s. You never realize how hard a good game of chess pushes a processor until you start smelling the smoke. So it’s good to play humans who don’t overheat. And I get beat on occasion which is good because as long as I play mistake free (huge caveat) I can beat or stalemate (usually stalemate) any chess program. But I’m no Carlsen Magnus. Plus I can’t play a speed game. That’s why I love this app. You’ve got six days to make your move before it forfeits for you. The one thing I don’t like about Chess w/ Friends, because I play 10 to 15 games at a time, is sometimes I get weaker opponents and it weakens my game then some novice beats me and gloats. I hate that. I usually beat them on the rematch then put ’em on ignore.

Netflix Originals are very good and get better with repeat viewings. Daredevil, Sense8, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Orange is the New Black are four of my favorite TV shows. I watched Sense8 again and it was better the second time. Then I re-watched Daredevil and it was better for the second time as well. Netflix is making some good TV.

Catastrophe

Amazon Prime (not anywhere near Netflix level) has a few good shows and a couple of promising ones coming soon. Catastrophe is very funny and original. The soft insults between the two lead characters are so funny. And I can’t wait for The Man in The High Castle and the return of Mozart in the Jungle and Transparent. Plus, you know, free shipping and music and movies and stuff. And it goes well with my Kindle Fire.

Yoenis Cespedes and Juan Lagares in Colorado

New York Mets Trade Deadline Moves and storming into first place is good. I said a couple of months ago that all we needed was a right-hander with some power and they went out and got Yeonis Cespedes (somebody reads my blog) and since they got him they have gone from the worst offense in the league to the best offense in the league. A really good power hitter in the middle of the line-up makes everybody around them better because they all see more fastballs. They also picked up Juan Uribe, Kelly Johnson and called up Michael Conforto; a young player with some pop. They were five games behind before the trades and now the Mets are in first place and have an eight game lead. And then… David Wright, the captain, came back. Woo Hoo!

Daily Show with Jon Stewart Finale was very good. By the end, the Daily Show was a shadow of its former self. But the last episode was a trip down correspondent memory lane with a touching tribute from Stephen Colbert, a great last rant from Jon, and Bruce Springsteen sent the show off with a couple of songs. It was a nice finish for one of my all-time favorite talk shows.

humans-amc

Humans on AMC was creepy good. Here is an intriguing and interesting show but it kind of got bogged down in the second half of the season. I liked it though, and hope it comes back for a second season. It reminds me of that zombie show that I eventually had to give up on except swap robots for zombies. In The Flesh. AMC is doing fine work. They have several of my favorite shows including my absolute favorite, the amazing Halt & Catch Fire and the promising Fear (The Walking Dead) which wasn’t amazing but could get there if it can distant itself from the main show while still keeping its audience.

mr-robot-banner

Mr. Robot stayed good the entire way through. I know I mentioned this in my Early Summer What’s Good? but it needs a re-mentioning. Mr. Robot is fantastic. I read a bad review that said the thing they didn’t like was that they thought it would be impossible for them to keep up this level. That was a bad review. If “I don’t think they can stay this good for very long” is the worst thing you can say about a show, it’s got to be good. Truly amazing. With more than a few episodes in the first season that make you want to watch again from the beginning to see what you missed. They delayed the finale because it was disturbingly similar to something that happened here at a news station (more gun violence what else). But judging just by that, it will probably be disturbingly amazing.

And since I’m mentioning shows I talked about last time.

Halle Berry Extant

I need to apologize to Extant on CBS (also on Amazon Prime). The reboot in the second season is really working for me now. The whole robots versus aliens thing is awesome. The show is sort of about the extinction of the human race but you don’t know from which way it’s coming. There are aliens and there are robots and neither group likes humans very much. Extant can be light and fluffy and sometimes it takes itself too seriously but it’s actually pretty good. I really like the direction they’ve taken the story.

This is where I usually put up a new song that has me playing it on repeat. I’m waiting for Chris Cornell’s new one (also Puscifer) in September but what I can’t stop listening to right now is this shit right here. But it just came out a couple of days ago.

Dr. Dre – Compton (A Soundtrack)

Compton A Soundtrack

There is so much good on this soundtrack. Anderson .Paak. I can’t even begin to… Anderson .Paak. Kendrick Lamar is all over it. Anderson .Paak As well as all the usual suspects. Snoop, Eminem, Cube. Anderson .Paak

But honestly, the album serves as Anderson .Paak’s coming out party. Anderson is a drummer from Cali that raps and sings and makes hella weird videos. I love the guy. This is something he did with Knxwledge that is nasty as all hell called Suede…

My boy is fittin’ ta blow up.

And now… for everything there is a dark side.

WHAT’S NOT so GOOD?

Or 5 things that really disappointed me.

Let’s get right into the suck…

harvey_birdman

My Day in Court… sucked. even though they let me go home. They made me wait all day to find out if I signed in for a community service job from 23 years ago. TWENTY THREE YEARS!! It made my stomach ache. I brought money with me thinking I would just pay my fine and get on with my life but they wanted to first find out how much the door panels cost before they figured out what my fine would be or if I had to do jail time. And after making me wait a month and a half in anxiety and paranoia, they tell me I have to wait another month and a half while they get their shit together and find out what the damage is. Meanwhile I’m going through all the scenarios by which I end up in prison and I lose my apartment and all of my stuff gets ransacked by whoever puts it in storage. And they’re making me come back for more humiliation. Because the ADA just has to point out that the argument was about my underwear while stifling a giggle. She’s quite literally a child.

Airing my Dirty Laundry

On a related note… After my run in with Mr. Huang, my local launder, I haven’t left the house at all and that sucks. I’m back to being afraid to interact with people and I feel like everybody in the neighborhood thinks I shit my pants. It wasn’t feces. It was blood. And the fact that I have to explain that to anyone causes me pain. (I know I just posted it here but at this point it’s part of the public record) It was black underwear and it was dried blood. And what really annoyed me is that he had to discuss it with the whole laundry.

“Your honor, there’s a reason ‘to air ones dirty laundry’ is synonymous with indiscretion. It is the very definition of indiscretion. Hasn’t he been humiliated enough? Your honor, I move that all charges be dropped and my client be allowed to leave the courtroom with what’s left of his dignity.” (thunderous applause)

This Man Is A Fool

Donald Trump as a legitimate candidate for president of the United States, surprisingly, doesn’t suck. This is what the Republican party has become. This is what the election of Barack Obama has done to them. 30 million Donald Trumps without a clue. And they can’t deny it. He shares all of their traits. Anger, Racism, a weak grasp of reality, an entitled attitude based on skin color alone, the lies and the Insults about the government, the rampant misogyny… the list goes on. But I’m enjoying this. Truly I am. It serves as a last chance for the few sane Republicans to abandon their party and their hateful ideology. When you see yourself bigger than life, this giant ugly version of yourself, it should serve as a wake-up call. The party of lies and hate has found their mascot. But what really sucks is how it makes us look to the world. We were just getting over the image George Bush created. Now we’re not just stupid, we’re angry racists as well.

Wet Hot American Netflix

Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp on Netflix was not so good. I think I just expected more. I’m not saying there wasn’t some funny moments but the entire thing played like a series of cameos. It was nice seeing Janeanne Garofalo on my screen again. (I had the biggest crush on her back in the day) but I wasn’t amused by this star-studded prequel to the cult classic about counselors at a summer camp. I wanted more. Even though the entire series taking place in one day is pretty fucking funny.

Hannibal

Hannibal finally returned to form after going way off course with its European excursion. But it’s too late to save the series. Not good Hannibal. You should have never ended last season with total carnage and then basically took it all back. Like saying, we apologize. No one died. I loved the second season. I just hated the way it ended and coming back like nothing happened made me hate it all the more.

Coming Soon to What’s Good:

Minority Report

New Fall Show Leaked Pilots are good. And these are the ones I liked: The best of them was Minority Report which looked cool but had a lot of effects and we all know those shows never last on the major networks. But I also liked Lucifer which looked good because of the title character being unbelievably awesome and sexy. And there was Supergirl which looked super cute and fun even though the pilot needed work. But what I’m also looking forward to is the return of my doctor. That’s right I called him MY doctor. Peter Capaldi is my favorite doctor on Doctor Who. And one day, if I ever get out of this funk, I will do a post about why Peter is my favorite doctor. It will be amazing.

Coming Soon to What’s NOT so Good:

Chance_go_to_jail

But seriously I wish I could get out of this Funk. In the old days I would just buy some Cocaine and that would do it (I wouldn’t even know who to ask… and I don’t want to know). Coffee just doesn’t work on it. It’s a coffee proof funk. Alcohol doesn’t make it go away, it just makes it darker and more creative. Which is fine temporarily, I guess. Hopefully the day after I find out my punishment I’ll be back to normal… for me. And my new court date isn’t helping. So if there’s no Jail Time, I’ll see you guys in September.

Speaking of funky… and so as not to leave you with a bad taste in your mouth. I will leave you with this great song from my boy Anderson .Paak (the dot goes there). This song is about every relationship I ever had when I was on drugs. It’s called Drugs. Enjoy.

Nice. But the video is weird right?

Later Gators,

– Mel

Talk Shows – Variety Shows (Top Ten TV Mega Post Part Six)

The Mega Post continues with Part Six: Talk Shows

Most people, according to talk shows, get their news from talk shows. I don’t. I get my news from twitter like a sane person. But if you want to get a feel for what’s going on in the world all you have to do is listen to a late night talk show host try to make it into a joke. And then listen to the audience’s reaction.

Kristen Bell

I don’t watch TV live. More accurately, I don’t watch pre-recorded shows when they air. The only things I watch when they air are things that are LIVE when they air. I watch the news live. I watch sports live. I watch award shows live (and that’s about it). Everything else I record, Tivo, DVR (it’s a verb), wait for DVD, Download, find online and watch later…

Rhianna SNLHowever, the exception to this rule is the talk show. They aren’t really live. Most of them are taped in front of studio audiences in LA or New York at around 5 or 6 pm EST and broadcast six hours later. But what happens is, sometimes… sometimes a talk show is so juicy. A guest is so current or a news event is so interesting, that I have to watch a talk show when it airs. It just won’t wait.

Cher DeNiro Pfeiffer Saunders Norton

I grew up on Johnny Carson and I was into Letterman when I was in college. Me and my friends would smoke a bowl and watch Dave (it’s a cliché but there’s a reason it’s a cliché). However, even though a talk show is only as good as its guests, there are those rare shows that are even better when nobody good is on. The hosts and the comedy and the band more than make up for it.

So, here are ten talk shows where it does not matter to me who the guest is. I’m gonna watch it. And sometimes, if someone good is on, I even watch it live.

to the list…

First – my new favorite talk show…

Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)

1817836_CA_0407_oliver_01_CMC

Hosted by John Oliver

30 minutes

Last Week Tonight with John Oliver is the newest talk show on the list. He talks about current events. He does comedy bits. Shows some video clips. He has the occasional guest and even a band or two. But it is the host and the writers that make this show great. John Oliver is very funny. Very cute. And very likeable. His smile is infectious. And he doesn’t shy away from the big subjects. Hell, I think he’s tackled a major issue head on in every single show. Good job.

John Oliver

“In fairness, the world is pretty fucked up right now.”

John Oliver was one of my favorite correspondents on the Daily Show who really came into his own when he filled in for Jon Stewart who had left to make a movie. John Oliver was spectacular pinch-hitting. And even when Stewart came back, you could feel it. Oliver was different. He was just as good as Stewart and everybody felt it. They had to give that man his own show.

Last Week Tonight with John Oliver

And now that he’s on HBO, he doesn’t have to watch his language. He can go past the line of too controversial for standard cable. And since he’s only on once a week, he can pack a show with a weeks worth of comedy goodness. Recently he did a song about the prison crisis in the US with puppets that was pure genius dealing with rape and prison mortality and cost saving inhumane budget cuts and low-level drug offenses becoming a death sentence. It was amazing and he’s going to get an Emmy. Great show.

Watch it. Re-watch it. Share it. John Oliver does amazing work.

Next…

@midnight (Chris Hardwick/The Nerdist)

Chris Hardwick

Hosted by Chris Hardwick

22 minutes

I’ve only been a Chris Hardwick fan for maybe the last 3 or 4 years. But now I listen to the Nerdist podcast religiously. I like the questions Chris asks and the detail they go into with their guests. I really enjoy the “hostful” shows when they have no guest on and Chris and his two cohorts (Matt Myra and Jonah Ray) riff off of each other and talk about real life stuff. (Pretty much anything). A great set of guys.

The Nerdist

They did a show at the end of last year (2013) that some fans complained about because it was so serious and it dealt with loss and loneliness but I think it was the best hour of entertainment and information and emotional honesty I had experienced that entire year. I would love for them to take that show and transcribe it and bring it to the stage. I know there was a lot of “realness” there and it is hard to do that, but if great actors played the four roles (Chris’s GF joined in to the discussion) it would be a powerful and successful play about friendship, loss, love, and Christmas. (The feeeeeels… honestly I think I cried four times during that episode) Great stuff.

@midnight

But Hardwick also hosts talk shows (and that’s what this post is about). He had four at one point and now he has two and possibly a third. @midnight, a very funny show where comedians come on to make jokes about social media and pop culture. And also Talking Dead where cast members and other celebrities talk about The Walking Dead (One of my favorite shows). And most recently he hosted a Doctor Who after show called After Who which I hope continues all season.

Here’s a segment from Talking Dead with Lauren Cohan and Sonequa Martin-Green…

Watch him. Listen to him. Follow him. Chris does outstanding work and I think it’s because he comes across as genuine, egoless and pure hearted… and you can’t fake that shit.

The man is one of my hero.

Next…

The Soup Live with Joel McHale (E!)

Joel McHale

Hosted by Joel McHale

22 minutes

I don’t watch reality TV… but I love the Soup on E! (Now The Soup Live!). It shows the worst (or the best – depending on how you look at it) of reality and daytime talk and even news and niche channels. It condenses a week’s worth of the funniest clips and allows me to see and know the references that everyone talks about without having to watch those god-awful shows that are destroying society.

The Soup

Reality Shows are a big part of what’s destroying society. It’s the Glorification of bad behavior. So when Joel McHale rips them a new one for some outrageous act or racist comment or train wreck of an over-share. I laugh my ass off. I guess it makes me feel better about myself. Mostly because these people are so self-absorbed, superficial and short-sighted that I feel sorry for them.

Here’s a Soup short called Comedians in Cars getting Cocaine…

But even while adults like me pity them, kids want to be them. Kids who don’t see that these pseudo-celebrities are miserable people. That you can try to collect all the superficial crap and money and fame and stuff and it will never fill the hole left from having no personality, no self-awareness, no emotional maturity or human compassion, self-respect or a fucking soul. (end of rant)

The Soup - Season: 9

But watch The Soup. (Because these idiots are fun to laugh at)

Next – The Great One…

Late Show with David Letterman (CBS)

Robin Williams David Letterman

Hosted by David Letterman

62 minutes (with commercials)

I started watching David Letterman when he was on NBC after Carson. And I watched him for the band. David Letterman has the best band in late night TV history.

Late Show with David Letterman

I love it when Paul Shaffer and The World’s Most Dangerous Band (or The CBS Orchestra or whatever they’re calling themselves), plays with the musical guest. Because other than that we only heard them for the opening song, the end song and before and after commercial breaks and that was it. The band is amazing. The band was nasty from the beginning. The drummer; Anton Fig, and the bass player; Will Lee, are two of the best around. And they’ve had a host of great guitarists and then a horn section that’s just filthy. And frequent guests who would sit in with the band. Seriously, I started watching David Letterman’s show for the band.

The President with Dave

But I also enjoyed his interviews. Mostly because he doesn’t take shit from anyone. A lot of people don’t like him because they say he’s mean to his guest. But if you watch, he is professional and respectful until they cross the line or try to make fun of him and then he lets them have it. And I love him for that.

Here he is interviewing Emma Watson from 2009…

Watch him while he’s still here. (When I was in college it was a nightly ritual to roll up a fatty and watch Letterman. I am sad to see him go. End of an era)

Next – Let’s get stylish…

Fashion Police with Joan Rivers (E!)

Fashion Police Cast

Hosted by Joan Rivers with Kelly OsbourneGeorge Kotsiopoulos & Giuliana Rancic

60 minutes

I’ve been a fan of fashion since High School. And I know Fashion Police concentrates more on celebrity fashion but I love it anyway and I’m not going to apologize for it. I’m a big fan of award shows already, but the red carpet pre-shows (just showing the celebrities arriving) have become these amazing celebrity fashion shows and that’s just awesome.

Fashion Police Banner

I have never been a fan of runway models showing clothes. You could roll out the clothing on a hanger and it’s pretty much the same thing (sorry ladies but it’s very cookie cutter). I like seeing the designs on real people. Beautiful people – yes – but with real bodies. To me, award shows are the best fashion shows. Hands down.

Fashion Police

So every week Joan Rivers and friends cover every major fashion worthy event in the world and they critique the styles and the different celebrities and then Joan makes fun of them in that Joan Rivers way that some people call mean but I think is plain funny. At least once a show she makes me spit out my coffee. I like Joan (she should have gotten The Tonight Show after Carson… I’m just saying). She is very funny. Although she is better with writers than without them because she tends to repeat herself (I’m still just saying).

Here she is destroying Justin Bieber…

Watch it. (I love this show and I shouldn’t even call watching Fashion Police a guilty pleasure. It’s just a pleasure)

Next…

Real Time with Bill Maher (HBO)

Bill Maher

Hosted by Bill Maher

60 minutes

I love this HBO political chat show even if I think the host is a horse’s ass. Bill Maher is one of those guys who thinks he’s smarter than he is (takes one to know one).

Bill Maher and Dr Tyson

He is often overmatched in political discussions and allows his guests to talk circles around him. He is slow on the uptake (too much weed maybe) and even though I agree with many of his views, he has little idea on how to articulate them. It’s infuriating.

Bill Maher and Jay Z

But I still watch and on occasion he has a good panel, or just a panel that includes a smart liberal who can answer the repeated talking points on the right. And his New Rules segment can be really funny at times and always ends with a well-written rant. (Thank god for the writers… right Bill)

(Can’t embed your videos, Bill? Well screw you, sir)

Watch him anyway. (I’ll be over here yelling at the screen)

Next… Live from New York

Saturday Night Live (NBC)

Anne Hathaway

Hosted by a lot of very cool people through the years

93 minutes

I know it’s not a talk show. It’s a variety show. But there is a guest (sometimes more than one) and a musical act and a house band (a pretty good house band that was once led by the great Paul Shaffer) and comedy bits and jokes based on the news. So it has all the essential elements. I’ve watched SNL from the beginning.

SNL Original Cast

When I was a kid I would pretend to go to bed and then wake up and sneak watch it. Through the seventies and eighties it was all we talked about Monday at school. And though it has gone through some crappy periods. And shitty line-ups as well as writers, there were resurgent years and many great people who came through the cast and the writer’s room. Many many great people.

Saturday Night Live

The newest cast members (especially the women) are insanely funny and depending on the guest host, the show can feel just like it did when it was at the top of its game.

Jennifer Lawrence

But whether or not a show is good really has more to do with the host than anything else.

Here’s Louis C.K. on Black Jeopardy…

Watch it. It’s getting better. (Just no more Justin Bieber hosting… I beg you)

Next…

The Colbert Report (Comedy Central)

Stephen Colbert

Hosted by Stephen Colbert

22 minutes

In the last year of the Colbert Report (Stephen is taking over for the departing David Letterman) Stephen has softened a bit. His on-screen alter ego (with the same name) has gotten him into trouble and he has pushed the line a bit with his character’s uncomfortable views on race. However, he still has the best writers on TV. And he is one of the best deadpan comedians working. And no one is better at showing the absurdity of the right and the right-wing pundits on Fox News.

The Colbert Report

But for a talk show host, Stephen Colbert gives the worst interviews. They are the worst. The man is a genius (literally), so he is often able to use his persona to get his point across during the interviews (especially with right-wingers) but most of the time he fails and really only succeeds in being disrespectful to his guest. Because of this, I can’t stand his “Better Know a District” series. They are the most cringe inducing interviews of elected officials since The Ali G Show.

Stephen Colbert 2

And I love Stephen as a performer. I really love his voice work on Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law and on SNL (The Ambiguously Gay Duo). He is one of my favorite performers and I’m excited to see what he does with the Letterman time-slot and if people still like him once he drops the act. (Or if he even does)

Here he is addressing the #CancelColbert movement…

Watch his show while he’s still around. (He has the best writing staff on TV)

Next – we go across the pond…

The Graham Norton Show (BBC America)

Graham Norton

Hosted by Graham Norton

50 minutes

I love this British talk show because it throws a wrench into the one guest at a time classic talk show format and has all the guests come out at once and one by one Graham asks them a question each enabling the other guests to chime in on the discussion.

Depp Gervais

Graham Norton is an incredibly likeable host and the show’s open interview free-for-all is fantastic and even when I don’t recognize a guest or particularly like one, the other two celebs are always there to spice things up.

Lopez someguyidontknow Gillan

The Graham Norton Show is rarely if ever dull.

Graham Norton 2

The music guests are often very Britpop and most of the time I have no idea who they are. But then he ends the show with audience stories that are usually enjoyable and if they aren’t there’s a lever he can pull that flips their chair over and sends them away.

Here is a crazy conversation featuring Kylie Minogue, Russell Crowe, Cameron Diaz and Richard Ayoade that is hysterical…

Love it.

Lastly…

The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (CBS)

Craig Ferguson and Geoff the Robot

Hosted by Craig Ferguson

40 minutes

The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson features the funniest side-kick in late night, Geoff the Robot. And a host; Craig Ferguson, who doesn’t play by your rules, man.

Craig and friends

I remember early in the show’s run when the fire marshal told him he couldn’t light a sparkler without a fireman present and he thought that was ludicrous and ridiculous, so he lit it anyway and lost his permit to have an open flame on the set. So that he couldn’t have cooking segments for years. And the only reason he did it was because they told him he couldn’t. That’s Craig Ferguson in a nutshell. He does not give a fuck and it’s not an act. And that’s why I watch the show. (And he’s also a big Doctor Who fan… so there’s that)

Karen Gillan

But his sidekick, Geoff; a robot, is the funniest, quickest, most entertaining sidekick in late night history (sorry Andy Richter). And that’s why I love it. From the songs that they make up on the spot, to the voices, to the running gags, it is just plain madness.

Craig Ferguson

There’s no band. So Instead two guys in a horse costume come out and dance during commercials. It is the silliest and craziest thing I have enjoyed seeing on TV since the old UHF channel 68 (before cable) Uncle Floyd Show in New York. Craig says he’s leaving with Letterman at the end of the year. Say it ain’t so, Craig. We are going to miss you.

Here’s a Doctor Who themed show opening song that never aired…

Watch Craig while you still can.

And that’s ten…

Now you may have noticed that one of my all-time favorite shows is not on the list.

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart (Comedy Central)

The Daily Show

I love Jon’s work. And I’m a long-time fan of his show. Though I get angry with him sometimes for trying to show both sides of an argument that doesn’t have two sides. He tries to placate his critics on the right and he gives too much credit to people like Bill O’Reilly and viewers who hate-watch his show.

But he’s fallen off of this list because of a noticeable drop in quality as he has lost many of his long-time writers and several of his best correspondents. (John Oliver’s departure left a huge creative hole in the show and it shows) And now with Colbert leaving the channel as well, I wonder if Stewart will be able to keep up even this reduced quality. Or if he will instead hand The Daily Show reins over to someone else… Chris Hardwick perhaps.

Points

But these are just my top ten. So don’t get me wrong, I’d still watch Fallon or Kimmel or Seth Meyers or Conan if someone interesting were on but none of those guys are breaking any new ground. They’re doing Letterman’s act. Even if you asked them they would tell you that they were all doing a fresher version of Letterman. Letterman Jr. And like I said I grew up on Dave and Johnny. So I already know what they’re going to do. I already know the punchlines before they deliver them. I already know the questions before they ask them. So guys, try to surprise me or I’m just going to be bored. (Okay? Good talk)

And in the end we’ve learned two things: A talk show is only as good as its host. And there are not enough women in late night. (News or Talk Shows). What’s up with that?

Drama is up next.

Bring on the drama.

– Mel

Top Ten Bisexual TV Characters

The TV mega post has taken a turn for the difficult (I hate sitcoms). So instead of wracking my brain to come up with sitcoms (that are still on the air… R.I.P. Community gone too soon), here’s the list I promised you guys after the first installment.

My top ten favorite bisexual TV characters.

The rules are simple.

1) The character should be seen having sex with both men and women on the show (or at least it’s strongly implied).

2) I have to like the show they’re on. and

3) The character has to be sexy.

To the list…

THE SUPERNATURAL MONSTERS

Sex with these two just might kill you, but oh what a beautiful death.

Eric Northman (The Vampire) from True Blood (HBO)

Eric Northman

Sexy Eric

On a show with no shortage of bisexual characters (I like to call it bisexual softcore splatter porn… but that’s just me), Eric Northman’s insatiable lust for sex is only matched by his thirst for blood. A fan favorite from the first season, his character has evolved from being a sexy bad guy to being a sexy good guy to being a sexy badass.

Eric Northman 2

Bloody Eric

He shows up a lot on my blog so needless to say… I want to do bad things with him.

Bo Dennis (The Succubus) from Lost Girl (SyFy)

Bo Dennis and Lauren

Bo on top

This is Bo Dennis (the one on top).

Bo Dennis and Dyson

And here she is on the bottom

Bo has to be careful not to drain all the energy from her lovers. It would kill them. She’s a badass succubus. She uses sexual energy to survive and to heal. She’s the star of the fantastic Canadian show Lost Girl. She leaves a trail of bodies behind her.

Bo

She’s so freaking sexy, the queue to be her next victim circles around the block.

Next up…

THE DRAMATIC BAD-BOYS

These two powerful, sexy and well-dressed bad-boys are not to be fucked with.

Nolan Ross (The Hacker) from Revenge (ABC)

Emily (Amanda) and Nolan

Nolan Ross, best friend of Amanda…. Emily… um Amanda,  is a tech genius and master of disguise, who may not intimidate physically but will fuck your shit up with a computer.

Nolan and his boyfriend

Nolan and his boyfriend

He likes boys.

Nolan and his girlfriend

Nolan and his girlfriend

He likes girls.

Nolan in Disguise

Nolan in Disguise

He likes disguises. Nolan is cool. Nolan is sexy.

Frank Underwood (The Powerbroker) from House of Cards (Netflix)

Frank Underwood is an elected official with a thirst for power on the Netflix series House of Cards. No spoilers. No spoilers. Some people still haven’t gotten around to it..

Frank Underwood

“You’d better not spoil a thing.”

But I have to spoil this one little thing in order to justify putting him on this list…

Frank loves his wife.

Frank loves his wife.

Frank loves his wife.

Frank loves his bodyguard

Frank loves his bodyguard

Frank loves his bodyguard.

Frank loves Zoe

Frank loves Zoe

But most of all… Frank loves power. Frank is evil. Frank is sexy.

Next up…

THE SCI-FI HOTTIES

These two hotties will screw anything that moves. Just don’t fall in love.

Oberyn Martell (The Prince) from Game of Thrones (HBO)

Prince Oberyn and Tyrion

Prince Oberyn Martell is a well-dressed renown fighter from the HBO show Game of Thrones. He sauntered his well-dressed ass onto the screen in season four and quickly became a fan favorite for his fighting skills, badassness, and sexual appetite.

Oberyn

“Take off your clothes.”

He likes it all.

Oberyn and Ellaria

Oberyn and Ellaria and a whore (she is not timid)

And so does his lady, Ellaria Sand. They were the sexiest bisexual couple in Westeros. Quite possibly on TV (depending on who Eric Northman is banging). I hate to see him go.

Jack Harkness (The Captain) from Doctor Who & Torchwood (BBC)

Jack likes humans and non-humans alike

“Are you female or male? Oh who cares. Let’s fuck.”

Captain Jack became a fan favorite when he first appeared on the BBC hit Doctor Who and quickly earned a spin-off show called Torchwood. He won us over with his gorgeous smile and his cool-as-hell overcoat. His flirty bravado and his swashbuckling style.

Captain Jack is hot

Captain Jack is hot

Captain Jack is hot.

Jack and Ianto

Jack and Ianto… (heart breaking).

Captain Jack was real hot. But unfortunately Torchwood didn’t last. I hated to see him go.

Next up..

THE PRISON BITCHES

These women leave a path of sexual and physical destruction wherever they go.

Nancy Botwin (The Dealer) from Weeds (SHO)

Nancy Botwin

Nancy sells that MILF weed.

Nancy Botwin is the main character of the Showtime comedy Weeds. A sexy mother of three who manipulates men and women alike with her sexuality and love of danger. She starts off as a minor weed dealer and quickly builds a drug empire, leaving broken hearts and broken bodies in her wake. She’s bad to the bone and sexy to the core.

Nancy behind bars

Nancy behind bars

I can’t officially call her bisexual but she did have a prison fling. So, she makes the list for her sexy time behind bars. The opposite to her exception being next on the list.

Piper Chapman (The Smuggler)  from Orange is the New Black (Netflix)

Piper Chapman

Piper behind bars

Piper Chapman is the main character in the Netflix comedy Orange is the New Black. A sexy bride-to-be who goes to prison for an old drug smuggling charge. She is also manipulative and gets her way with a carefully placed flirty smile.

Piper behind bars

Still behind bars

There has been only one season. So I don’t know if Piper is a lesbian who was in denial for a little bit or bisexual. However she’s slept with men on the show and she’s slept with women on the show, so that qualifies her for this list.

Piper  and Alex

Piper and Alex

Like Nancy, I’m going to call her bisexual. It’s more fun that way.

THE EVIL ALIENS

These women will fuck you, kill you or both. They just haven’t decided yet.

Number Six (The Cylon) from Battlestar Galactica (SyFy)

Number Six

“Baltar. I want to have a three-way with D’anna.” “Oh. Alright. You’ve convinced me.”

Number Six is a Cylon from the space opera Battlestar Galactica. One of the first Cylons to show themselves to the enemy. She was deep undercover (in more ways than one).

Number Six and Baltar

“Would you destroy the world for me?” “You’re damn right I would… oh you’re serious.”

Not actually one single character, Cylon model Number Six are the ultimate femme fatale. Sexy assassin. terrorist. spy and temptress, they don’t know why they love sex so much. They just do. Sex with men, women. And sex with other Cylons.

Mirror Kira Nerys (The intendant) from Deep Space Nine (Synd)

Kira Nerys

Major Kira Nerys

Kira Nerys is a major on Deep Space Nine. A Bajoran, a badass but not evil. However in the mirror universe (bare with me. it’s a Star Trek thing), Kira Nerys was the Intendant of Terak Nor Station (DS9). A Bajoran, a badass, a bisexual and completely bad to the bone.

Kira Nerys kiss

Mirror Kira Nerys

Mirror Universe Star Trek is the best because all the characters are so much sexier.

And that’s ten bisexual characters… but wait there’s more. I also have two sexy fan fiction (and fan art) favorites to add… because I can.

THE FAN FICTION FAVES

Seven of Nine (The Borg) from Star Trek Voyager (UPN)

Seven of Nine

“I am… what the Borg would call… Very hot.”

Seven of Nine is a liberated Borg drone from Star Trek Voyager. She joined the Voyager crew and quickly became a fan favorite. She had romances with male crew members but the sexual tension between her and Janeway was palpable and inspired tons of fan fiction.

Seven and Janeway

“Seven, can I see you in my ready room?” “Are you ready for me, captain?”

And I’m inclined to agree.

Princess Xena (The Warrior) from Xena: Warrior Princess (Synd)

Xena

Xena with a sword.

Xena was a character from Hercules (and her own show) who may have been a demigod but was definitely a badass. She had romances with gods and demigods alike but her relationship with Gabrielle was understood by most fans of the show as more than just friends and it also inspired tons of sexy fan fiction.

Xena and Gabrielle

“We’re not about to kiss, Gabby.” “Oh yes we are.” “No we’re not.” ” Yes we are.”

Okay, now that’s twelve. Which is quite enough bisexual for one post. One for every month of the year (or hours on a clock if you’re a fast worker). This was a fun list to compile and I hope you liked it.

I didn’t include Sherlock because it was never confirmed that he liked men. He has sex with women on the show and in the beginning they assumed he was gay but they were mistaken and the John Watson / Sherlock Holmes (JohnLock) fan fiction is just wrong.

See you guys next time,

– Mel

Top Ten TV Mega Post in Ten Parts (The Imports 2/10)

Part two of my Top Ten TV Mega Post (in ten parts) is The Imports.

Since the only shows we import in the US are either in Spanish or in English. and I don’t speak Spanish as well as I used to, these shows are from English-speaking countries. (Okay, just Canada and the UK. Sorry Australia)

There are seven from the UK and three from Canada. Four are sci-fi, two are costumed dramas, two are mystery thrillers and two are police procedurals. And only two of them are not currently available in the US. I included them anyway because I have a lot of foreign followers and there are “ways” of getting them in the states.

To the list…

Black Mirror (UK)

black-mirror-logo

Created by Charlie Brooker

Anthology.

black-mirror-2

Black Mirror is an anthology science fiction series for the Internet Age. Black Mirror can be dark at times but the writing is top-notch and always eerily prophetic.

black_mirror

With two seasons and six spectacular episodes, this is one of my favorite shows. Cautionary tales about our society and where it’s headed. I love this show.

In the states you can’t see it yet unless you search for it and break the rules.

Continuum (Canada)

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Created by Simon Barry

Starring Rachel NicholsVictor WebsterErik KnudsenStephen LoboRoger CrossLexa Doig & Tony Amendola

Continuum is a futuristic time travel paradox thriller with action, cool gadgets and fights (the fight choreography is some of the best on TV… hands down) and a well-layered story starring the lovely Rachel Nichols as a cop from the future who comes back in time to stop a gang of time travelling terrorists from destroying her (scary, corporate, fascist) timeline.

Continuum_

I absolutely love this show.

In the states you can see it on Syfy.

Doctor Who (UK)

Doctor Who

Created by Sydney NewmanC. E. Webber and Donald Wilson

Starring Peter Capaldi & Jenna Coleman

Doctor Who combines past, present and futuristic time-travel paradoxes with action, adventure, comedy and drama. I’ve watched since Tom Baker was the Doctor and Douglas Adams was in charge, but after the 2005 reboot, Doctor Who has been one of the best shows on TV. Quite possibly the best show of the last eight years.

Capaldi and Coleman

I can’t wait for Peter Capaldi’s Doctor to take the Tardis control this August.

In the states you can see it on BBC America.

Downton Abbey (UK)

Downton Abbey

Created by Julian Fellowes

Starring Hugh BonnevilleJessica Brown FindlayLaura CarmichaelJim CarterBrendan CoyleMichelle DockeryKevin DoyleSiobhan FinneranJoanne FroggattThomas HowesLily JamesRob James-CollierAllen LeechRose LesliePhyllis LoganElizabeth McGovernSophie McSheraMatt MilneLesley NicolAmy NuttallDavid Robb & Maggie Smith

Downton Abbey is a 1920’s Historical household drama within a class system, the Upstairs/Downstairs for the 21st century. It has great characters and situations and the great Maggie Smith dropping mad one-liners. This show is a lot of fun for a historical costume drama that often kills off its main characters.

downton-abbey

They kill off a bunch of characters along the way but the show doesn’t lose a step. Just try not to get too attached. No really. They’re worse than Game of Thrones.

DOWNTON_ABBEY_SERIES2_EP1_74.jpg

Downton Abbey is awesome and it goes well with tea and biscuits.

In the states you can see it on PBS (months after its BBC broadcast… so the Christmas episode is in the Summer… what’s up with that, PBS?)

Lost Girl (Canada)

Lost Girl

Created by Michelle Lovretta

Starring Anna SilkKris Holden-RiedKsenia SoloZoie PalmerRick Howland & K. C. Collins

Lost Girl is about a bisexual super hero with a sexy, deadly, powerful thirst. She’s a succubus trying to control her urges. I love this show. I love the way the writers quote cool movies in every episode. The banter is witty, the characters are loveable (and fuckable) and the music is sensational. Did I say yet how much I love this show?

Bo

In many ways it is the granddaughter of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The dark and the light fey creatures fight for control of the human world but our hero, Bo (the lovely Anna Silk), refuses to choose a side thus throwing the balance of power into chaos.

Anna Silk

If I were to make a list of my favorite bisexual characters (Ooh. I need to make a list of my favorite bisexual characters) my girl, Bo would be right up there with Eric Northman from True Blood at the top of the list. And Nolan from Revenge.

Lost Girl on girl action

This is a very sexy show and I love it. Dear god, I love it so.

In the states you can see it on Syfy.

Motive (Canada)

Motive

Created by Daniel Cerone

Starring Kristin LehmanLouis FerreiraBrendan PennyLauren HollyCameron Bright & Roger Cross

Motive

Motive is my new favorite police procedural where the mystery is not the killer but the motive. I love this format. In the first 30 seconds of every episode they show you the killer and the victim and give you a mystery to solve. Why do they do it?

Motive 2

I love this show.

In the states you can see it on ABC.

Orphan Black (UK)

Orphan-Black

Created by Graeme Manson & John Fawcett

Starring Tatiana MaslanyDylan BruceJordan GavarisKevin HanchardMichael Mando & Maria Doyle Kennedy

Orphan Black is a clone mystery thriller with a great cast including the sensationally talented Tatiana Maslany. She carries the show and plays most of the parts… brilliantly I might add. Some of my favorite scenes of the show are when one of the characters that she plays pretends to be one of the other characters she plays to hilarious result. It is, in my opinion, Emmy award worthy acting. (That’s right. She was robbed)

Orphan Black ClonesOrphan Black is a developing mystery. But as the mystery unfolds, I just hope the writing holds up. These things have a tendency to get bogged down in minutiae. (#fingerscrossed)

In the states you can see it on BBC America.

Sherlock (UK)

Sherlock

Created by Mark Gatiss & Steven Moffat

Starring Benedict Cumberbatch & Martin Freeman

Sherlock is Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes in present day London. It stars the wonderful Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman. The show has evolved with each season (or series, as they call it). Sherlock Holmes has traditionally been a famous detective but with each season of this fantastic BBC re-imagining, he becomes more and more famous. It has become a spectacle and I don’t know if I like it.

Sherlock and Watson

Don’t get me wrong, the show is still amazing. The cast is amazing and the mysteries are intriguing but, and this is not going to be a popular opinion, I think the American show, Elementary is a better adaptation. I just think the BBC’s Sherlock has become too much of a Sherlock for the internet age while Elementary, with the female Watson (The excruciatingly lovely Lucy Liu) and the American setting, keeps Holmes grounded.

Sherlock2

Sure, looking something up online is what passes for detective work these days but it seems to me to be beneath the great Sherlock Holmes. I love the show. I love the show. I fucking love the show. I just don’t like the direction they’re heading.

In the states you can see it on PBS.

The Musketeers (UK)

The.Musketeers

Created by Adrian Hodges

Starring Tom BurkeHoward CharlesSantiago CabreraPeter CapaldiAlexandra DowlingRyan GageTamla KariMaimie McCoyLuke Pasqualino & Hugo Speer

The Musketeers is a BBC show that features Dumas’ Four Musketeers (Athos, Aramis, Porthos & D’artagnan) in an action-packed costumed adventure each week.

the_musketeers

I talk a lot on this blog about my first books. I wasn’t given children’s books as a kid. They gave me the complete works of Shakespeare, the complete Sherlock Holmes and a collection of the works of Dumas. There were others but these were the three with which I spent the most time. I didn’t quite know how to read then so I was given a dictionary.

Actually it went like this:

“I can’t read this.”

“There are pictures.”

“Only at the start of the chapter. I don’t know this word.”

“Here’s a dictionary.” THUD

“Thank you.”the-musketeers

These were my first books, my first friends, my first heroes and my introduction to the world of fiction and the human condition. If you take Sherlock Holmes and the Musketeers then put them in a Shakespearean tragedy (or comedy… or history for that matter) with nothing but a dictionary, I would be there to greet them. Saying, “Welcome to my world.”

Four Musketeers

This is a sexy (the costumes are pretty) and fun (it does not take itself seriously) and exciting (lots of sword fights, musket battles) action adventure show with a fantastic cast and cast of characters including Peter Capaldi as the evil Cardinal Armand Richelieu.

Capaldi

I love this show so very much that the theme song makes me do a little dance.

In the states you can see it on BBC America… I think.

Utopia (UK)

Utopia

Created by Dennis Kelly

Starring Alexandra RoachNathan Stewart-JarrettPaul HigginsFiona O’ShaughnessyAdeel AkhtarSteven Robertson, Oliver Woollford, Neil MaskellPaul ReadyGeraldine JamesJames Fox & Michael Smiley

Utopia is a mystery, conspiracy, thriller with a dark undertone. The plot involves a group of hackers and wanna-be revolutionaries who uncover a vast corporate conspiracy and are hunted by professional killers as well as an organization with power and influence.

utopia2Utopia is a violent and scary but very cool show. I love this show.

In the states you can’t see it unless you search for it and break the rules.

… and that’s it.

Left off the list were Babylon from Danny Boyle (with Brit Marling) and Mr. Selfridge with Jeremy Piven. One because it won’t get going until later this year and the other because I hate Jeremy Piven (even though the show’s pretty good).

See you on the couch,

– Mel