The rules are simple. The good get spared. The bad get spoiled.
Directed by Colm McCarthy
This movie was annoying. The Girl With All The Gifts is one of those movies that I couldn’t help but yell at all the way through. It’s tense and it’s got some cool bits and some good performances and a clever twist on the zombie apocalypse. But as with all zombie stories there are big holes in logic. Especially when it comes to how to make zombie children. However, before you think I didn’t like the movie, I actually liked The Girl With All The Gifts in between the annoying parts, because it was cute and silly, even while it was being gross and scary. And that was a very clever combination.
The Girl With All The Gifts is a zombie children’s story. A nightmare told from the point of view of a zombie little girl. The girl is awesome and she is sweet and she is scary. And yes, she is hungry. Zombies in the movie aren’t called Zombies. The Z word is never spoken. No one wants to use the word anymore. Because all the Zombie comedies from the last couple of decades have ruined the moniker for more serious films.
The Girl With All The Gifts is a serious film. Sure, it’s entirely from the child’s POV (just like the wonderful film Room) but this is a child that was raised in an institution that fears her and treats her like she’s a cross between a monster and a lab rat. It’s awful how they treat her. But that didn’t change the fact that every time someone turns their back on her, I thought she was going to try to eat them. I kind of hoped she would eat them actually. Like holding a bloody steak in front of the cutest little rabid dog and hoping for the best.
The children in the lab are the offspring of turned women. The babies turn en utero and eat their way out. This is the biggest plot hole of the bunch and again I liked the movie. I really liked the movie. So I’m not going to go into how this is monumentally stupid and an awful premise. I have only one word for you. And that word is teeth. But that’s not the only hole in this awful premise. The one about the rending of uncooked flesh from the inside by a fetus without canine incisors… you know what. I just said that I wasn’t going to get into that.
Pay no attention to that plot hole behind the curtain. The Girl With All The Gifts is an enjoyable fairy-tale of a zombie nightmare with some excellent performances from the four lead actors. Glenn Close is outstanding as the scientist in charge of the experiments to find a cure using these Zombie-hybrid children. Gemma Atherton is sufficiently annoying as the school teacher who keeps forgetting that her charges are human eating machines (and by human eating machines I mean they eat humans). Paddy Considine is fantastic as the sergeant who gradually learns to trust the young monster with his life. And “the girl” (played by Sennia Nanua) is amazing and she carries the entire movie (she’s in every scene) with astonishingly broad shoulders for such a little frame.
The Girl With All The Gifts is a great film idea and story with a few major glitches here and there along the way. More than a few yell at the screen moments of stupidity and some clever, if maddeningly sloppy, film-making. I don’t know if you can tell that I liked it from this review. But I liked it. Even though it annoyed me, I liked it a lot. Go watch it. (though you may hate it, so for god’s sake don’t buy it without watching it first… that would be recklessly putting too much faith in my opinion)
The Girl With All The Gifts is the sweetest little horror of a nightmarish monster of a zombie movie fairy-tale that you really shouldn’t turn your back on.
Watch it with the lights out.